Category Archives: JOKES CARTOONS

POT SMOKER SELFIE WITH POLICE IN IOWA USA

pot smoker selfie with police image www.policesearch.net

Selfie Absorbed: Gilbert H. Phelps, 20, of Iowa City, Iowa, was pulled over for speeding, but was arrested on charges of driving under the influence. Police say Phelps admitted to smoking pot, and was “measurably impaired” in his driving. While going through sobriety testing at the station, Phelps asked if he could take a “selfie” with the officer for posting on Snapchat. “To which I happily obliged,” the officer noted in his report. Phelps added “stickers” to the photo to illustrate police cars pulling him over. (RC/Cedar Rapids Gazette) …Which is an automatic fail.

ooo

Henry Sapiecha

POLICE HUMOUR & JOKES-Meant to kill the dog but killed himself

cartoon face & hand sketch moves points down animation www.policesearch.net

The Sentence That Can’t Be Appealed: Police in Pinellas Park, Fla., were pretty familiar with Dennis Eugene Emery, 57 — they had 34 “contacts” with him in two years, including arrests for domestic battery, aggravated assault, resisting arrest, and leaving the scene of a crash. They were called to his house again after he had a fight with his wife. Officers say that the fight escalated and Emery went and got a gun, and was threatening to shoot one of the family’s dogs. As he backed down from that threat, he uncocked the pistol — as it was pointed at his face. He shot himself, and was killed. (RC/St. Petersburg Tribune) …Emery’s final arrest was by Officer Darwin.

blindfolded man suicides gun image www.policesearch.net

OOO

Henry Sapiecha

POLICE HUMOUR & JOKES-These People Crack Me Up

cartoon face & hand sketch moves points down animation www.policesearch.net

These People Crack Me Up: A man called police in Hoover, Ala., to report a woman driving erratically. The caller also alleged that she was smoking crack cocaine — and had a child in the car. Officers located the car in a parking lot, and when one of them approached the vehicle, he saw Bari Williams, 44, allegedly with a crack pipe in her hand. When Williams rolled down the window, the officer said the “smell of burnt crack cocaine was overwhelming.” Williams got out of the car, saying she was a social worker and the pipe was her husband’s, but eventually allegedly confessed to smoking the crack herself. Williams was arrested, and the 5-year-old girl in the vehicle was taken into protective custody. Further investigation determined that Williams is indeed a social worker — she’s a case manager at a substance abuse treatment center. (MS/Birmingham News) …When she tells her clients, “I know what you’re going through,” she’s not kidding

cocaine-powder on black background image www.druglinks.infoad3904750_1364237284_18246.png

ooo

Henry Sapiecha

POLICE HUMOUR & JOKES-PICTURE THIS HOLD UP SITUATION

cartoon face & hand sketch moves points down animation www.policesearch.net

Can You Just Picture This? In Britain, guns were outlawed, so only outlaws have guns. Except for an unnamed 34-year-old man who attempted to rob a store in Cambridge, England. He apparently couldn’t get his hands on a real gun, so he threatened store staff that he would kill them — while holding up a photograph of a gun. The clerks didn’t feel terribly threatened: they called police, who quickly apprehended the man. Officers didn’t think he was much of a threat to society either: “He was released on police bail,” a police spokesman said, and ordered him to return to face charges in two months. (RC/Cambridge News) …The indigent man was promised appropriate counsel — a photograph of a lawyer.

hand gun to right image www.policesearch.netcourt wigs image www.policesearch.net

ooo

Henry Sapiecha

POLICE HUMOUR & JOKES-DON’T MESS WITH OLD PEOPLE

cartoon face & hand sketch moves points down animation www.policesearch.net

HOW TO CALL THE POLICE
WHEN YOU’RE OLD
AND DON’T MOVE FAST ANYMORE.

man hat moustache with hat image www.policesearch.net
Phillip Hewitson, an elderly man, from Norwich UK, was going up to bed, when his wife told him that he’d left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. Phillip opened the back door to go turn off the light, but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things.

He phoned the police, who asked “Is someone in your house?”

He said “No,” but some people are breaking into my garden shed and stealing from me.

Then the police dispatcher said “All patrols are busy. You should lock your doors and an officer will be along when one is available.”

Phillip said, “Okay.”

He hung up the phone and counted to 30.

Then he phoned the police again.

“Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people stealing things from my shed. Well you don’t have to worry about them now because I just shot them.” and he hung up.

Within five minutes, Six Police Cars, a SWAT Team, a Helicopter, two Fire Trucks, a Paramedic, and an Ambulance showed up at the Hewitson`s’ residence, and caught the burglars red-handed.

One of the Policemen said to Phillip, “I thought you said that you’d shot them!”

Phillip said, “I thought you said there was nobody available!”

(True Story) I LOVE IT!
Don’t mess with old people

ANIMAL SKIN BELTS BANNERS IMAGE www.pythonjungle (2)

Henry Sapiecha

STEALING MONEY FROM A MACHINE NEEDING FINGERPRINTS ID IS A JOKE READ THIS FUNNY ONE

cartoon face & hand sketch moves points down animation www.sunblestproducts (1)

Scratch and Lose: Ariel Sinclair, 23, apparently hatched a scheme to rip off a Virginia Beach, Va., drugstore where she worked as an assistant manager. According to police, Sinclair gained access to the store’s lottery machine to steal nearly $6,000 in cash. But her plan wasn’t foolproof. “If you’re providing your fingerprint to access this machine, I have no idea how, in your mind, you’re thinking you’re going to get away with this,” said police spokesman Adam Bernstein. With the fingerprint record in the machine, investigators were able to easily identify who accessed it, and arrested Sinclair for embezzlement. (MS/WTKR Hampton Roads) …She would have had better odds just buying the tickets.

AAA

Henry Sapiecha

HS Signature Blue on white